Days in distant past,
When I wished to grow up so fast.
Without an idea of what adulthood entails.
Just wanted to get out of the ‘shackles’ of ‘parental issues’ as I called it.
Countless races to school.
Ensuring to get there early because it depicts you are cool.
I get to school and try to pay attention so as to tell my dad what I learnt from school.
Yes! He always asked.
My first teddy bear was orange and white in color.
I loved it so much that I take pictures with it every time.
I cried when my dad took it from me saying: ‘Praise you are too old for teddy bear”.
Hide-and-seek was one of the best games
However, as I grew older it became increasingly lame.
Growing up didn’t have the most fun as I thought it would.
Was in primary four when I experienced molestation for the first time.
Didn’t know who to tell
The notion of parents was: “you should be wise enough to not allow such happen to you”
So, it hindered me from speaking up as I thought “instead of a support and help, I would receive beatings “
Going to a boarding school
Having to fend for myself,
Take care of myself,
Making decisions on my own without the input of parents,
Was when it dawned on me how much responsibility growing up comes with.
Stubbornness was what formed my being.
Grew up in a Christian home but did not know God for myself.
All thanks to my prayerful and disciplined parents.
Did something so wrong and was almost ‘killed’ by my mom.
Yes, I said ‘killed’ because she gave me the beatings of my life,
Which in turn formed my resolution… lol
Graduating from the senior secondary,
And boom! Reality dawned on me.
“I am really going to be on my own now”
Different thoughts began crawling in:
“How do I make sure I don’t end up a disappointment?”
“How do I discover purpose?”
“What on earth am I supposed to do?”
“Where am I to go from here?”
They were ‘what’, ‘where’ and ‘how’ questions…
Depression was almost creeping in…
Frustration was at my door step…
Giving up when I haven’t even started sat next to me…
…But then, I found answers to all my question
When I met this particular being!
Jesus; The Christ!
HE gave meaning to my existence…
Then I knew that growing up,
Trying to find your path can be so frustrating if HE is not invited.
I started to plan my growth
I started with baby steps on achieving set goals.
I took responsibility for my own life.
Growing up has a lot of emotional imbalances attached but then it gives a sense of responsibility with Christ in it.
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